By-Two Kaapi in an oilfield

The weblog of Abhilash Ravishankar, India.

Here I blog about my personal experiences [posting rarely]

At my tumblelog Intoxicated by possibility I blog about my opinions/likes/dislikes [posting heavily]

neGATEd dreams

Hae you ever faced this situation - When a damn mistake you made in writing a gate ( a logic gate, of course ) screws up all of your dreams and ambitions ?

Well, I am damn facing it now. Excuse me for the phenomenal increase in the number of 'damn's i use in this post. It's just that I am frustrated at myself. Frustrated at my inability to follow my dreams, frustrated at my inability to slog towards my ambitions, frustrated at seeing people making better grades than me, when I can bet a million bucks anytime on me outwitting them in any conceptual part of the course.

I am feeling really sick. Embedded Systems wsa where I envisioned working on a few years from now. Now, I feel I am technically incompetent to even spell 'Embedded Systems'. When I cant make an A grade out of 300 people doing a damned course 'Microprocessor Programming & Interfacing', how can I even think of being technically excellent in my area of expertise. All this when this was the only course I enjoyed during the whole semester. I flunked all others coz I hated them. I loved this damn course and still I couldn't make a grade. Hah! Embedded Systems ! Forget it !

I cant help but think that this is just a passing phase. It was destined to happen. And Microprocessors aren't the alpha and omega of Embedded Systems. I still stand a damn chance. At the end of it all I am frustrated at the inequity of fate. When an AND gate in place of a NOR made the difference. I feel this is a inflection point (You know, something like the one in 'The Butterfly Effect'). My life has changed. People might scoff at the triviality of my post, and the stupid statement that I made above that a B grade can change my life. But step off dudes! It has !

Listening to : 'Judgement' - Anathema
(Whenever you see a feeling of frustration in my posts, place a dollar on me listening to this day you will be Warren Buffet)


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