By-Two Kaapi in an oilfield

The weblog of Abhilash Ravishankar, India.

Here I blog about my personal experiences [posting rarely]

At my tumblelog Intoxicated by possibility I blog about my opinions/likes/dislikes [posting heavily]

Fear of the dark future

Sometimes, I feel the fear of,
uncertainty stinging clear.
And I can't help but ask
myself how much I'll let the fear
take the wheel and steer.

It's driven me before, and it seems to a faint,
haunting mass appeal.
I just hope its time I find that I,
should be the one behind the wheel.

Being the caffeine junkie that I am, I walk at 4 am in the morning with my friend towards the Coffee Corner here to pump some much needed Caffeine into my blood. As I walk along I just think about one thing - "Where am I heading towards?". A question I have asked myself 'n' number of times, and every time I acknowledged an excellent reply from myself. But then, today was something different. I couldnt answer myself. I felt as if I was being sucked into the deepest of wormholes by an unknown cosmic force trying to exterminate the very existence of a soul called Abhilash R on this puny planet called Earth. I tried to wriggle out. Well, the caffeine did help me wriggle out. But then, I am damn uncertain about what I am gonna do after BITS. Some souls do scoff when they read this, murmuring that I am one big idiot to think of life after BITS at this stage. I have just a phrase for them - "Please take the median of a triad of phalanges held up in the air". I feel that one should have a clear sense of direction before stepping into any activity. For me it is that goal, that vision that keeps fuelling me ahead. Now, that vision seems so hazy that not even a simulator can land a plane in such a foggy place.

Well, I will go nuts if I start explaining the various options I have, the implications of every option etc. I am just going by intuition for now. For I believe that 'Choice is an illusion'.


Post a Comment


This is a personal blog. The views and opinions expressed here represent my own and not those of the people, institutions or organizations that I may or may not be related with unless stated explicitly.


This blog and me


Blogger Templates by GeckoandFly modified and converted to Blogger Beta by Blogcrowds